Monday, May 3, 2010

When You Give You Get

"When you give you get."

This quote holds a special place in my heart. Recently I have had to remind myself of the meaning behind it. After my Dad passed away I had gone through a very tough time. What made it even more difficult was that my really good "friends" of the time were not there for me. They had been there for the many elaborate dinners I had cooked (I love to entertain Martha Stewart style), they were there for the big parties at my parent's house, and they were there for hanging out at my apartment every weekend. BUT where were they when I was sinking as low as I could possibly go?

There was a new friend I had just met at the time who has since become like a sister to me. That takes us back to the "friends for a season, a reason, and for a lifetime." It was obvious that the fair weather friends needed to go. And through this experience God had brought some real angels into my life. They cared for me and sat by my side until I was able to get my feet back on the ground.

When I was finally up to it, I flew to Puerto Vallarta, Mexico for a week to sooth my soul. I had lived there for two years when I was younger and I had wonderful friends waiting to cheer me up. One night after dinner one of my friend's buddies (who I had never met before) was sitting next to me at a coffee house. He had asked me why I was so sad. I explained to him about my father's passing and continued to divulge all the pain I felt from my "good friends" not being there for me. I told him about all of the wonderful things I had done for them and how I really loved each one of them. I went on and on about them not giving back to me the care I so lovingly had given them in such a traumatic point in my life. When I needed my friends most!

He then took a silver bracelet from his wrist and placed it on my own. He squeezed it shut without letting go. While wrapping both of his hands around my wrist he looked me straight in the eyes and said, "When you give you get." I had tears rolling down my cheeks. I said, "But what about the people who I cared and did so much for?" He told me that we should never look to receive back from the place we had shown our kindness. He said that we all must keep on giving and it will come back to us from other places. He reminded me that we should not give looking to receive.

It was a valuable lesson for me and twelve years later I have had to recall that encounter. With all of the things I have filled my schedule with lately and the huge projects I did for Little Chick's school I have to say that I was hurt that I did not receive any thanks for the hard work I had done to help out. However, after putting it all into perspective and remembering what my friend had told me, I realized that the only one I truly did all that work for was Little Chick. She had said she was proud of me and that is all I needed.

Being a giver at heart can be difficult at times, because we do not always receive the response we wish for. But I know for sure that when we give we truly do get. It may not be from the receiver, it may not be right away, but it does always come back.


  1. It is so important to give to others. It is really hard when we do not get the thanks we would like, but continuing to give is the way to go. I love this post!

  2. This is one of the most powerful posts to date. It reminds me, as well, to not seek the thanks and recognition we all crave, but to give because I want to and to look at all my life's blessings and know that that is what I have received in kind.

  3. This is really something to think about. I think we all always give with the expectaion of getting something back, whether it be a thank you or something in return. I like the quote.

  4. Great post! Giving comes from the heart with no expectations, but we still always have them. Your blog is really wonderful. I love the quotations.

  5. I love this post, cousin! I have been in this type of situation so many times, and at some point you realize that you give because you want to and that, beyond all the expectations of thanks and things in return, that is the only thing that matters.


  6. This post speaks volumes to me. I have never stopped and thought about it but it is so true. We should do things because we want to or should, not because we're going to get something in return.
    I love your blog. Glad to meet you through MBC.

  7. Wonderful post! When we give, we receive back three times or more.....but it's not up to us to decide when or where or how. That's the beauty of faith. I love that you recognized your daughter's pride in you as priceless; it is! Following you back! Pam @ Sallygoodin



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